Archive for the ‘Life in General’ Category

I am inspired by many things.

I get inspired by watching the sun rise on occasion. Those occasions being when I am not having to get up with the sun, mostly… Those mornings I am more inspired by my coffee than by the sunrise.

But I digress.

Inspiration comes in many forms, and one of my favourites is when it comes from what might be an unexpected source. Over the past number of years, I have been inspired by a man that maybe most people would consider to be a source of comedy, rather than inspiration.

However, I remain inspired, as well as entertained.

The man is Kevin Smith.

You should recognize the name, if you know me. Or if you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time. One might say that I am a fan. I own all the movies (except Red State, and that will come) and I have been a fan of his Evening With series, his books and Smodcasts for as long as they have been around.

I was a late bloomer. I didn’t really know who Silent Bob was until I was well into my thirties. Since then, I have grown older with him. I have been moved to far more than just laughter by the man, and by his sharing of the trials of his life. I have truly been inspired.

Today, I was listening to a Smodcast episode titled, “Hall Rats“. It was recorded at the San Diego Comicon. As is his way, he spent time answering questions from the audience that had gathered not only to see a clip of Red State, but to hear a truly great writer speak.

Kevin Smith is one of the best story-tellers on the planet. He is funny, poignant, relatable, intelligent and raunchy. His stories are great writing come to life. He is one of the few people that I could listen to talk for hours on end, and never grow bored.

Or feel the overwhelming need to punch them in the face.
But that’s just me.

During the course of this Smod, Kevin spoke about many things. But one little bit of wisdom almost knocked the wind out of me.

“Surround yourself with WHY NOT.”

He goes on to explain that a lot of the time, we have people around us that continually reply to every idea that you might have with a “Why?” rather than a “Why not?”.

Interesting thought, isn’t it?

Maybe those flights of fancy wouldn’t seem so flighty if you had someone that was saying, “why not?” rather than an eye-rolling “why?”. I thought about the times in my life where all it would have taken to give me the right push in the right direction would have been for someone to ask me why not – rather than why.

Creativity – another thing that Kevin touched on during this Smod – is something that requires WHY NOT. ‘Why not’ encourages thinking, ‘why not’ frees the mind to open up new avenues of action. ‘Why’ closes doors and shuts down passion.

I’ve decided that I want to be surrounded by WHY NOT.

Seems like a much more friendly environment to be in.

So thank you, Kevin Smith.

Once again you have inspired me, Sir.

Smod-on, Sir.

I, for one, love it when Silent Bob breaks the silence.

PS… I also love the dick and fart jokes.  Just sayin’.

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Interesting that it’s Independence Day.
Well, for the US people.
And maybe others that I am unaware of because I’m too lazy to look it up.

Anyhow.

I am aware that the fourth of July is a day when a country of people celebrates their separation from the tyrannical rule of an oppressive regime. Y’know. The British. Trust me, I’m Canadian. I know what it’s like to have to live under those Brits.

It’s sarcasm, people.
I do that, remember?

What I’d like to know is this.
Are you really Independent?

Or are you mired in seeking approval and endorsement by outside sources? Are you actually making you own choices, or are you standing by and waiting while others around you make your decisions for you? Are you trusting your instinct, or are you really just a flow-goer without a paddle?

Do you depend on others, or are you dependent on others?
Yes. There is a difference.
A very, very big one.

Think about it.

Just think about it.
Then grab a fucking paddle and start making waves for yourself.

That is all.

Yeah. This is a short post.
But I have said all I needed to say.

/itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini rant

Sometimes, you have to set off your own.

So.

This might comes as a surprise, but I swear a little bit.
By a ‘a little bit’, I actually mean ‘like a trucker’.

I come by it honestly. From years of working in the construction industry, and with – shockingly enough – truckers. This is not to say that I am incapable of carrying on a conversation without peppering it with spicy language. I am perfectly able to have a lot of conversations without a single curse word slipping past my balm’d lips.

I am not, however, generally capable of being stabby without swearing once or twice…
…a second.

Being someone like me (y’know – a potty mouth) is difficult when starting a new job somewhere in which one of the bosses does not swear. Construction industry or not, this woman doesn’t appreciate how much of a stress reliever a well placed ‘fuck me up a tree’ can be.  But we all respect her, so we zip our dirty lips.

Watching the field people – who, like me, are VERY used to cursing a blue streak – try to carry on a heated conversation whilst in the office has been a highly entertaining enterprise thus far.

It’s like working in the Office of Incomplete Sentences.

“I can’t fffff…..”
“If you don’t get that motherfuuu….”
“I fired his stupid aaaa….”
“What the fffff… Um, I mean this is the stupidest shhhh…”

And then people just walk away without ever really finishing what they have to say.

For instance, a rather burly field supervisor – who also happens to be the boss’s son – is often so flustered by his inability to swear in front of his mom that I have almost fallen over laughing at the results.

“I tried to get the fffff…lipping thing fixed, but it’s a piece of shhhh…ugar!”
“I sent the motherfff….lower in last week!”

And this is a guy who’s been around the field long enough to have hit himself in the head with a crowbar. That is not a clever way to say that he’s stupid, by the way. It’s just a fact that anyone with a high number of years working in the construction industry is bound to have hit themselves in the head with a crowbar.

Try not swearing when you do THAT.

So… I’ve been giggling behind their backs for a few weeks now.

Until today.

When I was driving home.

And someone passed me. On a hill. Against busy traffic. In a no-passing zone. Causing me to have to brake hard and gear down when he cut me off. Which caused me to get nicely stabby. And at times when I am stabby, my swearing is truly something to behold.

I opened my mouth…
and out came…

“You big stupid-head!”

You. Big. Stupid-head.

It might not have been so bad if I hadn’t been talking to someone on the phone that knows me very well, and that proceeded to kill himself laughing over what can only be called the biggest facepalm moment of my life.  I’m still frightened by my outburst, frankly.  I feel the need to make some kind of formal apology, or announcement.

*ahem*

I just want y’all to know something.

There is no fucking chance that I will ever fucking forget how to fucking swear. I will practice my fucking ass off. I will make god-damned sure that I fucking triple my off-work swearage in order to fucking ensure that my motherfucking filthy vocabulary is a well oiled fucking machine for the next fucking time some asstastic fucktaco douchebag shitdick makes me all stabby.

I shall never, ever call someone a big stupid-head again.

Unless I’m at fucking work.

Just sayin’.